Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye is easy. Parting ways is what tears your heart out.

I am thrilled my son, Philip, chose to serve a mission, and I was tickled pink when I learned he would serve in Tokyo, Japan. The truth is, I have been so excited for him that a smile has adorned my face through most of the packing and formalities and preparations... because I have been right there at his side.

This morning he stepped in line to board a plane, and for the first time I could not remain at his side. Saying good luck, farewell, I am proud of you, goodbye; that has been easy because I know he needs to go do this—to learn and to help and to serve and to grow. He is ready. It is all good. But I did not realize that at the moment I had to stop moving forward while he continued walking on through that line and out of my sight (waving graciously to his mom) my heart would claw out of my chest and go with him. It was hard for me to smile. And for the first time, I cried. Really cried. It hurt.

Don't get me wrong, I am still very happy for my son. He is exactly where he should be. And the experience will make him a better person. But I already miss him, and I miss the part of me he took with him.

My son is going to be a great missionary. I know it.

A Moonless Knight

I wished upon the moon one night, bewitched by how it shone so white.  While staring up with some excite my eyes beheld a wondrous sight!  The moon, so lustrous and white, transformed into an armored knight who caused me just a moments fright when he jumped down from such a height.  No more a soft celestial light, he was my lover, day and night. 

This caused the world a serious plight.  How harsh a sting and deep the bite inflicted on the world, alright, to lose their blackest-hour light. 

And so I've come to set things right, to offer up without a fight my lover wished for one clear night.  I hold him close.  He hugs me tight, then climbs again to heaven's height to glow a bluer shade of bright.  I stare at my beloved knight, not wanting to be impolite, and in my heart with all my might I wish a wish that isn't right. 

Now and then the world still spites a shadowless and moonless night when we steal softly out of sight to hold each other 'til daylight and share in lovers’ true delight.